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”“But you’re not really a virgin, except in the most technical meaning of the word. I mean, you have been letting men . . .” I didn’t know how to continue.Meryl was very blunt, and I had to admire her for that. “Oh, yeah, I do let men – what is that expression? – corn hole me quite freely.” She seemed to find that quite funny.It was one of those conversations that was so strange that I almost didn’t grasp the weirdness of it. I said, “But you don’t get any pleasure out of that.”“But I do, you just saw that. If you put your hand down there and fondle my cunt at the same time – well, I will quite reliably have an orgasm.”For a second I thought this all was a put-on, some kind of elaborate joke. She had more to say on the subject, “In Greece and other places, girls will preserve their virginity by only having anal sex.”“First of all, this isn’t Greece, and secondly, I think they’re basically kidding themselves.” Yet I knew what her next move would be – I’d be invited to be her next lover. "Oh, Alexander," my mother would say, "that's a good thing! It means you can get up and start your day right!" Fucking morning people.So with the slowness afforded to a newly graduated nineteen-year-old, and wasn't that the coolest thing ever, I shut off the world's worst alarm and got up.I nabbed my phone off it's charger and extracted myself from my sanctuary, my abode, my batchelor pad, my room upstairs; and began the descent down the carpeted stairs. Oh, how I love carpet.I swiped my blonde hair out from in front of my eyes, while barely hanging on the the railing to keep my sleep adled body upright. As I reached the bottom step, my world twisted. I found myself on the floor with a flash of red hair on my chest. The gremlin looked up to see my eighteen-year-old imp of a sister, Addison, or Addy as she insists I call her."Happy birthday, Alex!" She yelled, probably forgetting my ear was less that a foot away from her mouth. And... is that pancake I smell on her breath?"Hey,.
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