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I didn’t see who was driving, but they headed north on the highway going like a bat out of hell!”“Thanks, Bobby, that could be a big help.” He keyed his radio and gave instructions for his deputies to watch the roads going north and to notify the state cops to do the same.The paramedic arrived at Frank’s side and started her examination. From a quick head to toe, the only injuries she could find other than the one to his face, were some scrapes and bruises on his arms and back. There was an entry wound in his left cheek and an exit from his right. He couldn’t bite down so she thought his jaw was probably broken. A small piece of his tongue and some teeth were missing as well. She started to apply a cervical collar, but Frank wouldn’t have it.“I don’t need that damn thing! Just help me sit up.”She insisted, “Sir, you have a possible head injury and you were thrown from your truck. You really need to let us take the proper precautions!”He pushed her hand away and sat up to spit out. I slipped into bed next to my wife and grabbed her butt. I was ready to make love. "Get your hands off of me," she yelled."Honey," I replied. "I want to make love to you. I'm all hot and horny for you."She turned over and looked at me. "Do you think I'm going to fire up this big ass grill for one little hot dog?" Needless to say, I didn't get any that night or for the next month.Another problem I used to seem to have is my wife always wanted me to stand behind her and protect her. Believe me, she was more than able to take care of herself. I remember one time when we went to this one bar. It was pretty crowded and the only seats in the place were two empty stools at the counter.We sat down but I didn't realize my wife was sitting next to a man who was totally inebriated. My wife looked at me with that look of disgust. I gave her my, "I'm sorry, I didn't know" frown. Then it happened. The drunk let out the biggest fart you ever heard. Phffffffttt.My wife gave me that, "do something".
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