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Sometimes though,they'd call. Now I had a 'nice' voice admittedly, but could I learn to bejust a bit more girlish? "A male selling lingerie? You know? . . ."When I said that I'd try, she said that she'd ask Bobbi to coach me athome. As I left, she thought of something else. If she was on the phoneand had to talk to me, it wouldn't sound right to call me Tommy, would it?Did I have a problem with Tammi?And everything kept dragging me in. My spouse was the boss in therelationship, and I played the woman's role. My only friend was a girl. Inow had a woman's job in a woman's industry. I read nothing but women'smagazines and watched nothing but women's T.V. Mary's constant attentionhad resulted in my nails becoming as feminine as my hair. She occasionallyexperimented with lipstick and eyeshadow, and I was now "Tammi" toeveryone. With constant reminders at home, and on-the-job training, myvoice became continually softer. I was soft in mind, and soft in body.Then it happened. One. ” I just about choked on a fork full of food.“Okay, it’s okay, we tell each other everything. So whenyou fuck me later, it had better be as good as your oralwork.” She smiled. “Don’t want to get a bad report card,do we?” she asked slyly.“Oh you minx, I bet you tease all the boys!”The rest of the meal was spent in laughter andrediscovery. Tawnee had grown into a beautiful youngwoman with a charm of her own. I found myself tellingher of my marriage, its collapse and the heartbreak thatwent with losing a daughter. She was only seven and shewill not grow to know who I am. I hadn’t been ordered tostay away from her, but what happens is simple. As a daughter grows, she changes, I can’t keep up withwho she is at that moment, every second weekend is justnot enough. I become an alien, someone who is herfather, but essentially I become as strange to her asshe does to me. That is the real tragedy of our divorceand custody battles,.
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