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I flipped open the wine menu thinking I could use a glass of red to steady my nerves. Malbec? No, something sweeter. Desmond gently pulled the wine menu out of my hand.“This is a dry occasion. We’ll just have sparkling water, thank you.”The waiter nodded and walked away.I arched an eyebrow at him. He grinned placing his hand on my belly. “You shouldn’t be drinking in your condition.”I rolled my eyes at him. “You think you already got me pregnant?”He laughed. “I know I already got you pregnant. The rest of the week is just for fun now.”I smiled with one side of my mouth. Trying to keep what grace I had left.I studied the menu. My mouth watered at the thought of a good dish of Spaghetti Cacio e Pepe.Desmond busied himself with the menu. His hand rested in my lap. Not that I didn’t want it there, but I never had a man do that before. It wasn’t the groping exploratory feel of a youth fumbling his way through his first date. It was confident like he knew where his place was and he was. My turns went fine, thanks to the drilling I'd done. I could do those without thinking, without effort. It was just my swimming that sucked. I tried. I really tried. But it just seemed the harder I tried, the faster he went. It was as if my energy was affecting his speed, not mine. I lost by 3.2 seconds. The next closest person was over 5 seconds back, but that didn't help any.I'd had enough. I had my shot at love and I blew it. No reason to obsess on it any further. Time to realize Jill was gone and get on with my life.The pats on the back and "You'll get 'em next time"s were fewer and a lot less sincere. I didn't think I would be out if I got three strikes but I didn't want them just the same.I felt a lot better when it was time to line up for my third event, the 200 meter breaststroke. I looked down the pool. Twenty five meters to the end. Just 8 laps, faster than the others and I'd have this one. I can do it.My dive was clean. I was almost halfway down the pool when I took my.
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