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“Well yeah man, it happens. In class, movies, around friends…you name it, it pops up.” He nods. A few moments pass as I study him, wondering what he’s thinking. In the dim light I can see him shaking. I put my arm around him and pull him into me. “Hey, were pretty much brothers man, or gonna be soon. You can talk to me about anything man.”He sits there quietly, then nods. “I just wonder if I’m normal,” he says barely audibly. “I mean, I know my foster parents love me, and your family, but…I’ve been alone since I was six. And I don’t have a girlfriend, don’t know how to get one, don’t know what’s going on with my body and thoughts…”He lets out a huge sigh and I see a small tear run down his face.“Zane, its ok bro,” I whisper as I rub his arm softly. “You’re ok. I mean, you’ve got a family here. Or will soon. You’ll find a girl.” I squeeze his arm where his biceps have started to develop some, “and hey, puberty’s doing you some good kid!”“Yeah…I suppose.” He says then looks at me.. I like the shaft black. I like the sex black. I close my eyes to keep it black. When there is no light, all men are black but they are not the same shade. I like the blackest shade…even in the dark. The blackest of men are invisible in the deep dark. The way I like it.My mask has eyes but it doesn’t see; it’s no secret what I am when I wear it. I close them. I forbid my dark lust to be seen. I clench them shut to conceal the yearning desire inside of me lest it light the room and change the mood. My mood. His mood.If I choose, I see him in the dimmest of light; but I do not choose. I prefer an image of him in my mind in the dark; him taking me as a thief takes silver from a darkened home. Shadowy. Subversive. He does not break and enter. He has a key and he uses it. His shadow has a shadow. It intends to take my silver and I desire to surrender it without a struggle.Legs open. He is inside. I feel his darkness inside, too. I thrust against my image of him and grasp him, to guide him,.
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