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" I'd swear you are trying to get me drunk, Mr. Fowler," she laughed. "No more drunk than me," I retorted. "But you are right, I'll have to call you an Uber or something, cause no way I should be driving you home tonight. Or you can just crash in the guest bedroom." Guest bedroom, huh?" she said. "Is that the room with the hidden cameras so you can film me in all my private glory?" I, uhh, well, I don't..." I'm k**ding dummy," she interjected. "Although now you've got me worried." No need to worry," I replied. "Had I known you were going to spend the night in my guest room, I would have setup my secret spy cameras. You'll have to give me more advanced warning next time." I like your style, creepy," she giggled. "Do you mind if I take a shower and wash off all this sweat?" Go for it, towels are in the hall closet. Do you need anything else?" I replied."No, just your promise that you won't spy on me," she laughed as she headed for the shower.I wanted nothing more than to peep around the. .* * *A few days later, I took the redeye back to San Francisco in guy mode,and presented myself the next morning at The House of Fabulous, whichbilled itself as a transformation studio for "Boys Who Should Have BeenGirls." No doubt most of their customers were flaming gays who gottheir kicks out of channeling their inner RuPauls, and I wondered if Iwas making a huge mistake when a matronly woman greeted me at thegingerbread door of a Victorian house on Castro Street. "You must beCissy," she said, reciting the phony name I'd used to make anappointment. "I'm Madame Fabulous." Yes," I stammered. "I lost a bet, and I need to make myself look likea woman." Of course," she said, appraising me with a critical eye. "Frankly, I'malmost embarrassed to take your money, considering how feminine youare."Her words were a dagger to my heart. "I have a medical condition," Isaid defensively. "Is it really that obvious?" Sweetheart, in a few hours I'll have you walking out of here lookinglike.
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