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"Yes, we do. I think the first building we need after temporary shelters are finished is a large dry kiln for the lumber and then probably another few buildings for the sawmill," I said."I don't understand why we need a sawmill with Charlie furnishing that plastic lumber he's been providing," Charles said."He can't continue to do that indefinitely. It isn't that he actually can't though, it's that he won't be here after a while. There is another project that will be consuming his time. It isn't a construction type endeavor though," I said, hoping he didn't start fishing for information.It wasn't that I'd hesitate to give him the need to know spiel, I wouldn't. I'd rather not have to though. I knew how I'd react to getting that wad of shit spit back at me from someone I was busting my ass for, and Charles was busting his ass for me. Even if you can realize that it's probably all for the best when you're cut out of the loop, it still puts a bad taste in your mouth. I decided to try. College was such a wonderful period of experimentation and self-realization. It was when I (nervously) bought my own female clothes and shoes for the first time. It was then I became certain that Jeff was really Jennifer and that she would not go away. In fact, once she got a little peek at the outside world, she would not be denied at all. I tried to put her away or relegate her to an occasional fetish, but it never worked. I even purged all her stuff a time or two. But inevitably the unquenchable need to be Jennifer always came back, and it would come back stronger and quicker each time I tried to deny her.Truth be told, I am glad I attempted to get rid of Jennifer. Because my failure to do so has affirmed that she is who I am and who I was meant to be. The fact that my desire to be a woman would never go away, but had become instinctual helped prove to me that I was never truly a Jeff, but always a Jenn. She wasn’t a fetish or some deviation on being bi or gay, but real.
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