Putting some of it down on electronic paper left me in a good mood the entire next day which is rare for me.Part of that is learned behavior when you just accept life sucks and prepare for the worst then you can be pleasantly surprised. Which I’ve found beats the hell out of having hope and then getting it crushed out of you time after time. The other part comes from being in chronic pain. It’s hard to be in a civil much less happy mood when you constantly hurt. It wears on you. Then there’s the anxiety that comes from the fallout of the illness. I.E. paying bills with little money. Trying to maintain relationships. Worries about the future and if you have one.Every now and then though, things ease up a bit. You don’t hurt so much. You’re mind is a little clearer and you find a smile on your face. That’s me at the moment. My head hurts and I had to leave work early because I went totally mute. But I’m not shaking and I don’t need my cane and my wife’s not crying or yelling at me. I. I started to notice that all my grandfather'sentries were from the previous days and from what I could make out itlooks like a lot of transformations or something like that. All I couldmake out were the words estrogen and testosterone.Chapter 2: What happened last night. As I was reading or at least trying to read my grandfather'sjournal entries I was trying to recreate a formula my grandfather used,but I was not having a lot of luck. Apparently the estrogen and thetestosterone were blocking each other so I knew I had increase one ordecrease the other. So I tried to increase the testosterone and leavethe estrogen alone but nothing happened, same when I tried the otherway. I then tried to increase the estrogen and decrease thetestosterone when all of a sudden my screen had a pop up come on thescreen saying sequence successful and with that the cup I was using fora possible liquid began to fill up with what appeared to be a pinkishcolor liquid. I decided that that since I didn't have a.
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