He was watching his wife Roxy's back porch, imagining what it would be like if he could get it bent over the workbench in his outdoor workshop.Yes, Jimmy was the brunt of the neighborhood jokes, a small slight man, with a face resembling Arthur C. Newman from Mad magazine, and a body that looked like it was thrown together from spare parts. However, he had a mind that exuded ideas and words that sounded like a foreign language. ...And Jimmy had a secret, a very BIG secret, one that the women of the neighborhood were soon going to learn to appreciate...Jimmy married his virgin sweetheart, Roxy, right after graduate school. A beautiful 5'4" blonde, she wasn't overly interested in sex. It was his steeltrap mind that enthralled her. Sure, she knew sex was part of marriage but convinced herself it wouldn't be a problem... little did she know. Their honeymoon was a disaster, he was simply too big for her. They tried everything, lube, fingers, oral, toys. Nothing worked... he just couldn't. Stare, rather. Stacie looked incredible. She was wearing a pair of jeans that left her gender in no doubt, a brightly-patterned silk blouse, and a red scarf with shoes to match. The overall effect was, as she'd intended, casual elegance. I pulled her to me and kissed her."Be careful," she said, "you'll smear my makeup."I kissed her once again. "I reserve the right, madame, to smear that makeup later. In fact, I may lick it off."Stacie gave me a mock punch. "Pig," she said, "you men are only interested in one thing." Actually, I can think of several things of interest," I said, "and, if memory serves, you have them all." Seriously, Jack, please get ready." Stacie, don't be so nervous. These are our friends. Even if we were a few minutes late, I'm sure they'd forgive us." But I meekly followed her to the bedroom. Once there, I put on a pair of slacks, a casual shirt and a pair of loafers. I was ready. According to my watch, it had taken less than five minutes. Guys are like that.We.
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