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These Are Compliments of John ASome are dated but are still funny...1. My goal for 2016 was to lose just 10 pounds. Only 15 to go.2. Ate salad for dinner. Mostly croutons & tomatoes. Really just one big round crouton covered with tomato sauce. And cheese. FINE, it was a pizza. I ate a pizza.3. How to prepare Tofu:a. Throw it in the trashb. Grill some meat4. I just did a week’s worth of cardio after walking into a spider web.5. I don’t mean to brag, but I finished my 14-day diet food in 3 hours and 20 minutes.6. A recent study has found women who carry a little extra weight live longer than men who mention it.7. Kids today don’t know how easy they have it. When I was young, I had to walk 9 feet through shag carpet to change the TV channel.8. Senility has been a smooth transition for me.9. Remember back when we were kids and every time it was below zero out they closed school? Me neither.10. I may not be that funny or athletic or good looking or smart or talented. I forgot where I was. This silent man, in his starched white shalwar kamiz suit, and white namaz ke topi (skull cap) was held in respect by all who knew him.Today, he stood behind the counter of his shop and examined the prescription the lady in front of him had just handed him. He knew the woman casually. She had become a regular in the market and was often in his shop buying cosmetics or other items. He had watched her enter the shop, in a tight shinny blue suit with a black dupatta around her head. Her face heavily made up with dark red lip stick and black eye liner. She handed ali the prescription and looked over the cosmetics display counter.Ali knew what she was from the moment he first saw her swing her hips provocatively and smile coyly in the market. Any doubts he may have had, were silenced by the sight of her slowly walking along the side of the road and getting into various cars as they stopped beside her. She was a prostitute. Everyone said she was….Ali could smell the heavy scent of her.
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