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Once they had managed to untangle the man the policemen started askingquestions.'Right sir can I see your licence,''Er, sorry officer, it's in my other wallet.''Can you tell us what happened?''Um a cat ran across the road and I swerved to avoid it.'I couldn't help it. I should have kept my mouth shut. But remember, Ihad just a very fraught day. I opened my big mouth and said, 'Youbloody liar, you were touching me up!'Both Mick and Dave's eyes swivelled towards me. I had made a boo boo. Irealised that.'Don't I know you, Miss?' said Dave.I stepped back slightly, into the gloom.'Erm, I don't think so, officer.''Can you substantiate your statement, Miss?''Sorry, I don't understand.''Have you any witnesses to your alleged assault.'Why do policemen have to talk like that? Can't they just speak plainEnglish?'How could I have a witness, he was going about 50 miles an hour, whenhe groped me!' |I was getting angry now at how stupid these copperswere being. I was forgetting that I was a girl. So the question is can you drive a car, and if so can you stay on the right side of the road." Give me your keys, I am both sober and know my right from my left," he said.I gave him my car keys from the pocket of the cargo pants. I was very careful not to put the keys in the same pocket as the one containing the, 38. It was okay to have keys in the pocket with the box openers though.He paid the bill and herded me into the parking lot. I pointed out the old blue Toyota. "Well I see you don't waste your compensation on shiny new automobiles," he said with a laugh."It only gets worse," I said as we crawled into the car.I didn't even notice how he drove since it was only a short distance to my apartment. "When you pull into the drive, stay to the right as far as you can and still be on the pavement." I demanded.He parked the car then said, "Nice old house," Yes it is, but I don't live there. I live in the maid's apartment over the garage," I said to correct his thinking. He followed me.
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