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They scream ‘school girl,’ and you are a matron. Young woman, what is your name?”“Dorcas, milady.”“And before you were Lady Esther’s maid, you were?”“Chambermaid for a solicitor’s family, milady.”“No criticism intended, but I don’t think that qualifies you for this expedition. I think, Esther, that we’ll see whether our mutual mother in law will join us.”Lady Fenhurst, the dowager countess of Fenhurst, joined them. “You should listen to Anne rather than me,” she told Esther. “You are much of an age, while I am a generation older and have been rusticating.”Lady Anne asked about a traveling outfit and a dress for morning visits to be ready in four days. When she was told that this was possible, she suggested some other outfits to be sent on later. One was a riding habit.“But, Lady Anne,” Esther said, “I do not ride.”“Does your religion prohibit it?”“Not in the least.” It was almost a necessity for preachers, and not considered wrong for women.“Well, you do not know whether you shall. The police get called in to break up the fight.The following week, all members of both families appear in court. The fight continues in the court room until the Judge finally brings calm with the use of his hammer, shouting “Silence in Court.”The court room goes silent and Paddy (the best man) stands up and says, “Judge ... I was the best man at the wedding and I think I should explain what happened.”The Judge agrees and asks Paddy to take the stand. Paddy begins his explanation by telling the court that it is traditional in a Cavan wedding that the Best Man gets the first dance with the Bride.The judge says “OK.”“Well”, said Paddy, “After I had finished the first dance, the music kept going, so I continued dancing to the second song, and after that the music kept going and I was dancing to the third song ... when all of a sudden the Groom leapt over the table, ran towards us and gave the Bride an unmerciful kick in her privates.”The Judge instantly responded... “Wow ... that must.
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