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She had calmed significantly since I’d last noticed her.“That was something else,” Heather murmured as she turned around to lie facing me.“As good as promised,” I agreed.Alana had promised it would be, and she was right.Jagged thoughts still zipped through my brain, a product of the twin highs of arousal and marijuana. I had promised myself that I would tell Heather about Alana, and before I could talk myself out of it yet again, I let my mouth speak the words.“You know, someone once told me about having sex after getting high, too.”“Who, Lara?”“No, someone I never told you about.”“Who’s that?”I felt like I was speaking so slowly. “This girl I met when I was fishing at the Esopus. After we came back from Montauk and went camping.”Heather reached a hand to my chest, stroking it gently for a moment before speaking.“How did that topic come up?”“She was camping with some friends, and we all hung out for a bit at our camp. They had weed, which they shared with me and Lara. That was my. " I am grateful for that Marian. The thing is I have no idea how I willrespond to men. I like it when they stare at me now, but I also love itwhen women do the same thing. To tell you the truth, I have no ideawhat would happen if I were to go out with a man on a date. I know thatI look like a woman enough now to pass, but I'm still wondering whatwould happen, especially if the man started to come on to me." Here's the thing, Robin. You have to decide how far you want to gowith the man. Do you just want a platonic relationship, or do you wanthim to touch your boobs? Do you want him to take off your top and bra?Do you want him to suck on your nipples? It is very important to let aman know ahead of time that you are transitioning and that you stillhave a penis. It might turn him off totally, but not nearly as much asif he finds out when he is trying to get his hands under your dress. Hemight understand and go as far as you let him, or he might dump you likea hot potato. That.
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