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Me and her.”She laughs out loud. Looks at the bartender but he’s not looking at her. Looks towards the door then back at me.“What kind of affair this that?”I turn to her.“It has its benefits,” I say.“What could be in it for you? Texts that say ‘thinking about you’?”I smile as I look down. Shake my head no.The sun comes out behind a cloud and some light spills in through the window over the door. The rest of the bar is pretty dark except for one window-sized square of sunlight now on the floor.“It’s something else. It’s like having a presence that only two people know about. That’s not a good way of saying it.”She looks at me.“I get it. You like the secret.” I cock my head slightly to think about that.“Maybe. But it’s more. The whole world knows who they think you are. Even with a boyfriend or a husband or a wife you still play a little bit of a role. If your thing is barking like a dog, it’s hard to bark like a dog then go balance the checkbook then pick up the kids at soccer. . (which I did on purpose to get her to come near me). Her flowery smell would drive the boys crazy. Her boobs gently dangling in front of our eyes These were just innocent encouraging gestures, but for me, it was something i treasured. I would re-imagine the scene of me kissing vidya, flush on her lips, or me suckling her ripe boobs as she played with my hair. But, all this was just dreams. I used to deliberately stay back for special class, hoping to get a chance with her. even she used to say that i needed no coaching.. Being a studious type, i feared if i tried anything, i would be sacked from school, and always kept these forbidden desires, locked inside. Soon, after my board exams, I went to school to give my teachers sweets. I went at last to vidya, to tell her i had secured 94 in maths. She laughed and said “Where did the six marks go. Always aim for perfection. Anyways great going” and shook my hand. I replied “Yes mam. I learned from you what perfection is and i will follow.
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