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But Cathy's reaction is way over the top.The morning after, Cathy talks about my infantile need for male bonding. She calls my friends cavemen and says she doesn't want them to set foot in her house ever again. When I'm in a good mood, I let her insults pass without response. I might even mouth some half-hearted apology. But usually I'm not in a good mood. Usually I have a hangover after having drunk more than I should, because I was furious about Cathy's behavior. Usually I don't accept any criticism of me or my friends. I remind Cathy that this is not her house, but ours, that I have as many rights as she has. I don't cede an inch and we have an almighty row.These fights have become a permanent feature of our relationship. I could almost mark them in advance on the calendar. The day after I host the poker game is the day for an argument. It got to the point that I asked my friends a few times to skip me when it was my turn. I said something about problems with the plumbing and that. “Food? Drink?” I walk towards the cabinet in the corner, the one that holds small snacks and drinks that are stored there, mostly for the benefit of the people working here. Aliens tend to be a teensy bit food aggressive, so it’s not a good idea to dangle snacks in front of their faces.Then again, if the snack serves as a distraction and keeps you from becoming the snack yourself… dangle away. You might luck out.“Naked. Eat,” my client insists and stretches one appendage towards me at a disconcerting pace, like some creeptastic grabby baby hand, if babies were monster slugs.“Food.”Male reaching for me saying ‘food’. I’m having a déjà vu and a sudden yet overwhelming moment of clarity, an epiphany, a sad realization of the most profound proportions: I need a Change in my life. A big one. ASAP and at whatever cost.I toss the foodstuff – dried meat, some alien fruits, and the Vurn X’lora 15 equivalent of prawn crackers – into the reaching tentacle’s general direction and dance out of.
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