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God, I feel stuffed, mum said. We've got about 15 minutes before the coach goes, I told mum, do you want another glass of wine? You'll be getting me pissed, mum said. Now why would I want to do that? I asked her. So you can fuck me, mum replied. So of course I got her another glass.When it was time to go, mum managed to stand up at the second attempt, but hung on to the table for a moment for support. She weaved her way back to the coach and stumbled up the steps onto it. The people on the coach were now watching mum with even more interest as she made her way giggling to the back, her boobs swaying as they threatened to escape from their skimpy support. When we arrived at the caves, our courier shepherded us through the entrance to the relative coolness and darkness of the caverns and their connecting passages. I kept my arm firmly around mum's waist as everyone oohed and aahed their way round. After some while mum announced that she needed a pee, but the only toilets were. They are saying that if even beautiful people can't find a partner, ever, what hope have the uglies got? And fair enough with J-Lo or Jennifer Whatsherface, you might thing twice because of the whole mystique around them, but Melissa Joan Hart, she is just so adorable, cute and bubbly." She's on one of your lists isn't she?" Yep, the second one."Rachel groaned. I had two lists. The first list was my 'I would cheat with her behind your back' list. This contained all the women that if I could I would have a one-night stand with. The second, shorter, list was the 'I'd leave you and marry them' list. Rachel was amused when she heard about them, reasoning that I'd never meet any of the people on the list anyway, what's the harm in me having my fantasies? It even sparked up a little role-play. Although she had threatened to batter me if Keira Knightley ever appeared in the second list. I assured her that Keira was a list one person only, I'd probably break her after repeated uses, and.
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