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He was the best in the world when it came to farting on command&hellip, and he didnt care where, or in front of whom&hellip, hed cut a big one just for fun. His laugh was contagious, and his wit was quick. It had been years since I attended a funeral, but I surely wouldnt miss Joes. Joes wife, Linda, had given them two sons. Joe, jr. (J.J) and Gary. Both boys were now young men with families of their own. J.J. had three daughters, the oldest being seven, and Gary had a four year old son. Although both boys looked like carbon copies of Joe, Linda loved to tease them about being the UPS mans sons. To the best of my knowledge (and over the years I learned a lot) Linda had never been unfaithful to Joe. I always hoped that if she decided to, though, I would be the lucky one. I had pissed at the same urinal trough with Joe many times&hellip, I knew how small his cock was. Verification of that came from my wife, whom he talked into giving him a head job while Linda and I watched a Cowboys. “You’re a long way from California,” he said conversationally as he finished filling out the ticket. I nodded, not really wanting to talk to the cop, afraid I would start laughing at the entire situation. “So, what are you doing all the way in South Texas?” I looked up at him and put on my best innocent girl face, “I’m visiting my parents.” He handed me the ticket to sign. I had to look at the name he wrote, to make sure I didn’t sign the wrong alias on the ticket. Handing it and his pen back I waited patiently as cars drove by, people staring, glad it wasn’t them pulled over. The officer gave me my copy of the ticket with the usual instructions and warnings, before he nodded and ambled back to his cruiser. I waited for him to drive away before scrunching up the ticket and throwing it out the window. My death was imminent, I didn’t have the time or inclination to worry about a speeding ticket. I arrived at my parent’s house a little before eight o’clock. I walked slowly up to the.
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