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"Isn't my cooking to your taste?" I asked."Oh oui, pommes der terre a la Microwave," she said, "You're hopeless, you should let me cook." she suggested."Then you aren't locked up all day." I pointed out."But I'm bored!" she said, "This is really fucking boring ok?" she said, "All my friends are having a great time and all I get is screwed for half an hour and two hot meals a day, otherwise I don't see you." "I'll get a reciprocating fucking machine," I suggested."No!" she said, "Look maybe it was a mistake ok, maybe I'm not cut out to be a sex slave?" But we've got all the gear now, the hoist and the tripod and the wheel," I explained."And it was fun, making it all work, but we've done it all now, it's all boring repetition," she said."What you enjoyed installing it," I asked incredulously, "I thought we would never get the cement dust out of your hair." We did it together though didn't we, we were a team Brian," she said, "Not master and slave." But Pattie," I explained, "It cost. .. Then we’re looking at a big boat crossing over a river – tourists leaning over the sides, taking pictures ... Then we’re looking down on a busy motorway – cars flying by at 70-80-90mph ... A sign by the road indicates that this is the A127, and that the next turn-off is to Southend-On-Sea.Next - we’re in a layby/small car park, just off to the side of the motorway, surrounded and sheltered by trees – the sound of cars rushing by an ever-present background whoosh as we watch a familiar figure walking toward us with a deliberate and confident stride, carrying a microphone in one hand.She’s wearing a jacket that is open at the front, revealing a blouse with several buttons undone and plenty of firm cleavage on show inside. It’s Charley – our hostess with the mostess. She talks through a confident smile, and whilst she might not be the greatest presenter of all time, we’d take her over any other.She speaks directly to camera as she approaches, “Welcome to the United Kingdom of Zoo. I’m.
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