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They were usually older women who she worked with. Lisa was a couple years older than me which would be a continual source of agitation for my parents who saw Lisa as a "bad influence" but nothing could be further from the truth. It would eventually end when she moved to California. Despite exchanging letters and phone calls this gradually tapered off and finally ceased. I was deeply saddened by the end of our relationship but it gave me the strength and courage to pursue other relationships without the shame I previously felt. When I began to work I had more access to women who were likeminded and had a number of brief affairs. I officially lost my virginity to a lesbian cook named Maya. She reminded me of my old classmate Angel. She was black and very large breasted. I was a new waitress at this restaurant and it did not take long before she picked up my vibes. She had a distinct masculine quality that aroused me. We fucked for the first time late one night after everyone else had. Being in a traditional, committed relationship with my girlfriend, I didn’t want to jeopardize it. However, my lust for cock grew. I found myself first watching straight porn and fantasizing about being the girl, sucking cock and taking cum. Sometimes even watching gay porn and starting to find other men’s bodies attractive. Eventually, I found sissy training videos and I knew what I wanted. Those images and messages of being submissive to a man’s needs, to be used, to suck cock and swallow cum. I now knew what was missing, a need that had to be satisfied. It was almost all I could think about.Knowing I would be alone for the next few weeks, I set up an online ad on a gay dating site. I was open and honest, I said I had to be discreet, wasn’t looking for a relationship, but wanted to suck a man’s cock to completion. To be on my knees for him and to be cummed on and in. I included pictures and stats. I am not a small guy, big, tall and muscular, I honestly wasn’t sure if anyone would.
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