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A recipe for disaster and you can trust me on that. It’s now 20 years later and I am still with my wife. I used to tell people, and myself, ‘look how long we have been together’, it must be true love. True Love, I don’t even know if it exists for me any more. I know it did once, once upon a time, in a galaxy far, far away. But now, all I have is a life I sentenced myself to because I was going to be responsible for the children I brought into this world. I am a Father and I am a Dad. I wanted to be part of their lives and not at the edge but the center as it should be. So I stayed. I sometimes wonder about this decision. Was it worth it? I am now turning 50 years old and my life is normal from an external viewpoint but internally, inside me? I am a mess. I need some tenderness and understanding and physical contact. Touching, cuddling and so forth. These are things that I desperately need and I am not getting. To feel a woman’s soft body snuggle into mine as I wrap my arms around her. “Okay, but not here and it can only happen once. Deal?” “It's a deal and you have a month to pay or you are out. No second chances. Understood?” “Okay. Where and when do you want to do this.” “Come up to my apartment tonight at 10.” We shook hands and I went to leave. “I'll see you later, Tom.” She turned to look out the balcony and lit a cigarette.******************************* I sat on my sofa watching highlights of the game. I wasn't paying any attention because I was just too excited for my meeting with Barbara. I made my apartment presentable and cleaned myself up real good. I haven't really kept up with my appearance ever since I divorced my ex wife six years ago. I was left with almost nothing in that divorce back then, so I ended moving into the building that my dad owned. He died four years ago, so I inherited the building. My bitch ex-wife won't take this from me. My father was very strict when it came for people to pay the rent. In contrast with me, which I was.
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