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“I mean this morning Joe and I had a shower and as I was getting dressed he just pushed me back on the bed, pulled my knickers off and fucked me again. We seemed to have lost that spontaneity.”I shrugged.“He... he did some things to me last night that you haven’t done in ages and there was one thing we did that you have never done.”“Oh?”“We’ve never had anal sex have we?”I looked down at my coffee. “I didn’t even realise you were into that.”“I didn’t know myself but he wanted to do it with me and I said okay I’ll give it a go.”“And you enjoyed it?”“Yes, it was very nice.”“Well I’m glad you had a good time,” I said churlishly.“I’m sorry I don’t mean to hurt you but it was different with him,” she said. “And I’m sure it’s the same with you. There was a time when you would never have done something like what you did but someone new and exciting came along and you took up the opportunity.”I said nothing.“You do understand what I’m trying to say, don’t you?”I nodded. “Yes, I suppose. You died. And the human body just isn’t made to stand up to the wear and tear of life as we know it. Not for more than eighty or ninety years. I’d met people who were a hundred but none of them had the body or the stamina they wished for. They were old. People get old. People die. That’s life.And, like I said, I was satisfied with mine. I just didn’t want to die.Big—a name my friend got in his teens sixty-some years ago—had a different opinion.“Just don’t resuscitate me. I’ve had enough of this life and it will be a blessing to put it behind me. Just let me go and Lord, make it soon. The only thing I have to look forward to in this life is beating you at pinochle Wednesday night and it isn’t that big a thrill. The food’s nothing to look forward to. They won’t let me drink. I haven’t had a smoke in over a year. And sex is a distant memory. Jesus, just let me die.”I offered to put him out of my misery a couple of times.“I don’t want you to kill me! Just let me die.”“Well, would you get.
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