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I could not wait. i know i would have been saved from all this pain if i could have started to bea girl then. But the specialist, oh the specialist that supposedly knew itall told me to join a gay group, which was the final blow. i knew, deep in myheart that i wasn't gay. i like girls and always will. For a long time afterthat i was totally defeated. My hurt and pain turned into depression,anger, and rage. Yeah, that convinced them i was a male totally. But i wasn't.i was covering it up, and as much as i tried to make sense out of my own head,the realization didn't come until months ago. i'm much better because of it."Some how i was holding on. For the love of God, i didn't know why. Nowit was time to use the second biggest weapon in my arsenal. She mighthave known about the rest, but this part she never knew. This would bethe final test of my strength, and i knew i was close to becoming nothing more then a sobbing baby. "My gender identity has turned out to be something both humble. Daddy told her I needed a change of scenery so to speak. I heard my dad say she needs to find her way and I believe she will fit right in with the rest of us. I did not understand what daddy meant by she will fit right in with the rest of us. I was soon to find out just what he was getting at.“You’re Aunt Lisa and Uncle Mike will be here Friday to pick you up,” daddy said as he wrapped his arms around me. “I am sure you will find all you are looking for at their campground,” daddy added.I really did not want to go as I figured Janet and I would find a way to be together. I wanted to stay and play with Janet, as I was sure she would sneak over when her dad was at work. I tried calling her but they must have gotten a new number, as the old one did not work. I waited all week for her to call me but she never did and Friday was soon here.Uncle Mike and I loaded my bags into his truck while daddy and Aunt Lisa talked. As we loaded the bags, I saw Uncle Mike staring at my tits as I had on.
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