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The computer’s name for itself was “Mother.” In fact, every ship’s AI computer was named Mother. There was some historical reason for this.Mother said (in a sexy female voice), “Yes Sir”, and the message started playing:“Mayday!!! Mayday!!! This is an automated distress signal from the passenger liner H.M.S. Beverly, of the planet Delta Gamma Hydra 614-2, enroot to Beta Pi Gamma 302-3, requesting immediate assistance! The Beverly has had a major hyperdrive malfunction. Life support is minimal and failing. The ship is adrift in the Beta Meta Tau 232 star system. The ship’s drive systems have been destroyed and the ship is on a collision course with the star in the system. The computer estimates the ship will be destroyed in fifty minutes ten point two seconds.” I had to chuckle. The point two seconds were important only to a computer.The recording continued, “Sensors indicate that the control section of the ship is catastrophically damaged and there are no life signs in that section.. ”He put down the ball and had me hit it, and this time it only went about 10° off true.“Much better. You’re still rotating the club a bit. Let’s hit a dozen or so and try to keep a proper grip, and don’t rotate your hands on the backswing. Try to be smooth as well.”I hit the twelve balls, most of which went off the center line, and Ron made some adjustments to my stance, then had me hit the rest of the bucket of balls, making minor corrections along the way. By the time I was done, I could hit the ball relatively straight, though the distance was lacking.“We’ll work on distance next time,” he said. “Your stance and swing are the keys to playing an enjoyable round of golf. If you develop bad habits, you’ll find yourself frustrated, and be one of those people who think ‘golf’ is a ‘four-letter word’ or a way to ruin a nice walk in the countryside. If you develop good habits, you’ll enjoy a round of golf with your doctor and lawyer friends, and it’ll be a wonderful social time. See you.
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