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She was barefooted, and as I looked at her, I was getting turned on again. As she walked toward me, bringing the coffee and breakfast plate, I wanted to turn the chair I was sitting on around, facing her, to pull her down on me while she had both hands full. I decided that wasn’t such a great idea, but it started the hard on in my shorts. We talked about stuff in general and then she started clearing the table. To show my appreciation I helped clear the dishes. She was standing at the sink rinsing the dishes when I came up behind her and hugged her around her waist. She said “ I can tell that last night wasn’t enough for you, right?”.I squeezed her tighter and said “I’m sorry, last night was the greatest night in my life”.She wiped her hands and turned facing me. We kissed. Her mouth was wet and inviting. She opened her mouth slightly and sucked on my lips. And then it started all over again. I dropped my shorts down until they fell to the floor, and then slowly lifted up her dress. I got carried away. It’s been so hard, not talking to her, after what’s happened ... I didn’t mean—”Now she really broke down. I hesitated, and then moved to crouch by her side. Taking her into a hug, she melted against me.“I am so sorry,” she cried softly. “I feel like this is all my fault. For not telling her the truth when she was younger, and for not exerting a firmer hand as she grew up. Now she runs away from all of us, and for what? For nothing.”“No, not nothing. You said it yourself: it’s who she is,” I said quietly.“Yes, yes, Matt. Of course it is ... But that doesn’t make it any easier.”I was quiet for a time. Mairead calmed herself and gave me a little squeeze before excusing herself to the bathroom. I took to my chair again, sipping my tea, contemplating everything Heather’s mom had told me, and everything she seemed to be implying.She’ll leave you, again and again... A part of me found this so hard to believe, even as another wondered if it was the truth. Well, I wasn’t.
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